[Story] The Ghostclaw – Sath’alor’s Journal

Nessna took Rylad into the city to see his grandpas, I thought I would go by the healers’ in Tranquillien to see if they could see my side of things. Nessna keeps saying that they want her to patrol, but I figured maybe it was just some kind of girl thing where they just said that so she wouldn’t feel bad in front of me. I thought maybe if I went without her, they’d be more honest. But no! Well first of all, Kestrae was there, with her baby. Aeramin’s baby. It definitely looks like him, I don’t know how he could have denied it. She has really bright orange curly hair. She’s getting teeth right now, Kes had brought her in for a check up and she just happened to be there when I went. Great! I didn’t even know what to say, it was so awkward. She didn’t ask how I was doing or anything, of course I didn’t either. Anyway, Lani said that it was important for Nessna to patrol so she’d be in good shape when the baby is born. Except she’s already in good shape, she’s a ranger! I don’t think taking a few months off is going to change that. I just don’t think exposing her and the baby to all those things is really a good idea, plus her armor doesn’t really fit anymore, and I don’t know how she’s going to be able to shoot a bow once she gets a lot bigger. I don’t know how big she will be, I didn’t see Isandri when she was. I keep asking every day if I’ll be able to feel him or her but I haven’t yet, I think baby is playing a game to trick me! I’m just so scared that something might happen to her, to both of them. Lani did suggest that I could patrol with them, which I’ve thought about doing, but then Rylad would be left alone. I guess he could stay up at the school during patrols, it wouldn’t be the whole day. I just feel bad leaving him there when he should be with one of his parents. But I’ll ask Hethurin about it, it’s not that I don’t trust Ty with her, but I think I’d feel a bit better if I could actually see that she’s okay. I worry so much that I can’t get my work done until she gets home, some days.

I asked if there’s anything I can do about her feet hurting, like some of those foot salts or something, and Lani said she had some there. She went into the other room to get them, and left me and Kes alone for what seemed like forever. She didn’t really say anything then either. I mean I guess she’s doing well, she finally got the baby she wanted even if it wasn’t the usual way. I assume she’s happy. I used to think about what if things had ended up different, but I don’t really any more. I think things turned out really well, and I’m glad Rylad has a father too. He’s really cute, he’s started trying to shoot his toy bow. Of course he’s not very good at it yet, but it’s helping his arms get stronger. We can worry about technique later. The salts smell like flowers, I really hope they work and Nessna likes them. Lani also suggested that I give her massages, which I had to admit that I already do, with Kes sitting right there. That was awkward too! She didn’t say anything though. It’ll be strange when Rylad and Lyorri are at the school together too. He already knows his colors and numbers, he’s so smart. Not letters yet, but he has a while to go before he goes to school. He also knows all different kinds of cats. That’s important!

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